the beginning of the end

As I type this entry Jay is putting Sadie to bed. Without me. Without nursing.

I'm still not sure what I feel; we've been at this for 20 months now and that's a pretty long run. Sadie took to nursing like it was her only passion plus she has a milk allergy which made extended nursing almost compulsory. But for the last little while there have been times when I resent not being able to get in the house after work without my shirt being pulled in all directions. Or that I keep getting to work later and later as her morning feeds get longer and longer. Or that I forget what it's like to have my body to myself, keeping my chest as more of a mystery to strangers. Sure, gone will be the days where we could count on the backup nutrition of breastmilk, but hey, we are parents now and we should get a handle on feeding Sadie a balanced diet (well, avoiding milk and eggs isn't so easy...we're working on it). Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade this whole experience for anything in the world. We're taking it slow, but it's just that tonight is the night.

The beginning of the end.

corner collection 3

Here is another corner, revealing our one and only black door. Four years into the house and we still have 6 more to go. Sigh. And admittedly, this isn't so much a corner as a small space for sentimental things, such as the embroidered portrait of my old cat Cleo, perfectly captured by my wonderful (and dearly missed) friend Kristen, and the photobooth photo of me and my Dad when I was six and we were taking the train to Chapleau (I remember it was close to midnight, but my Dad and I went to hunt down some candy...some things never change), and a rare photo of Jay and I together at a friend's wedding (Jay wore his Dad's royal blue and orange suit, circa his parents wedding, 1970). These personal items only hang out in our bedroom, part of a decision we made a while ago regarding what goes where. But now that Sadie is here, meaningful memories are making their way into the public parts of our house too.

Thank you, Sadie.

siesta

Ahh, we're back from a sunny and sweltering Mexico. This prim and proper bunny has been half finished for some time now and after returning home I felt he had to be finished (plus he was a gift for friends who truly deserved his company). I've been feeling short on creative time, but I hope the springtime changes that. My new plan is to embark on weaning, keep my day job work to the daytime hours and get back to sewing.

Fingers crossed.

big eyed lady

Sadie hasn't made an appearance here lately, though it's not for lack of great things happening in her world. She's very found of saying hello (said as "halloo") and bye right now, plus she sings along with us in her own tune and space language which makes for many hidden giggles between me and Jay. A-year-and-a-half is a pretty cool age, but really what age hasn't been?

paper houses

Ahh, a long week done. I spent many late night hours this week building small paper houses, which was way more difficult than I imagined. It was great to play with paper again.

Sadie's "Swing Thing" is finished, but unfortunately it's HUGE. The sleeves are terribly long on her; overall it ended up more in the 3-4 year size (oops, but at least it wasn't too small right?) As for knitting, I came across a shawl/cardigan yesterday on a lunchtime shopping trip that is a linen/cotton blend and is based on the basic style of this design (though what I found was lacier and quite pretty). My only question - is this style too old? Will I feel like a grandma wrapping myself in it? Because I gotta say, it feels oh so cozy...

corner collection 2

Ahh, my nightly retreat. Sometime around 10pm this is the seat I sink into, hoping to knit or maybe catch up on The Daily Show. The basket lamp might not count as task lighting but if I sit just so there is enough light to illuminate my little projects.

No new dolls are in the making, so I think I better start using my day job as the excuse. It's an awesome job, but also pretty demanding. By the time 10pm rolls around, this seat is all I can think about as I put my brain to rest.

march break

It may not be a vacation, but March has certainly been a break from "making". Jay's show is up and the opening over, so life can return to normal now. Sadie's Swing Thing is getting there - slowly - but here is a picture in progress. I've started a sleeve and the Noro is working up quite differently; it's less stripey but still a great combination of colour. And the best surprise of the month is this great Camilla Engman softie called Kola. Friends of ours got her for us as a good luck charm (we're so spoiled!) and the whole family is smitten with her. Sadie danced a jig and Jay moved around old collections to give her a prime spot on the mantle. I think she'll bring me some charm for sure - time to get back to creating!

corner collection

We have a small, small house. When I took this picture I was only 4 feet from the other exterior wall, actually we could lay Jay down twice and make it from one side to the other. We don't even have many corners, but somehow a photo like this makes your space seem bigger. I've had great fun poking around the Flickr group "Corners of My Home" and I especially enjoy Tracy's submissions. I'm not ready for the Self Portrait challenge, but I could use a good reason for tidying up the corners of our tiny home. This is across from the computer and all of Sadie's books are on the bottom shelf. She likes to sit tucked in behind the chair reading to herself. And these shelves - built by the industrious Jay - hold a number of our collections. We are confirmed pack rats and a small house keeps us in check...in theory.

recovery

I wanted to call this entry "stomach explosion" but it would have tainted the image above for all the wrong reasons. So before the recovery story, here is the invite to Jay's show which opens Wednesday at le.gallery. The opening reception is Friday, March 17th for anyone in Toronto, and Jay will be exhibiting new Gum Blondes that haven't even made it to his website yet. I guess they're hot off the . . . jaws?

As for the recovery story, all my knitting and making came to a grinding halt as a nasty stomach flu took over our house (never good before an art show, but it'll work out.) Jay and I were totally struck down, the details - far too disgusting to share. Thank goodness my Mom came to our rescue! She stayed with us, took care of Sadie and even slept on our couch to give us the help we so desperately needed. She was the ultimate MOM, and I feel incredibly lucky that she was so quick to help. Thanks Mom - you're the best!

wool explosion

Once upon a time I was addicted to knitting miniature sweaters. I really thought my knitting would stay small and repetitive, but something has gone terribly wrong. Here is a sweater for Sadie, partly based on the idea of the boat neck baby sweater from Debbie Bliss' Baby Knits but knit without a pattern which explains its HUGEness. At least she'll get two winters out of it, and by next year that tiny ponytail might actually stay in her hair (they last about 7 minutes now!) And then if that wasn't enough, my good friend Elizabeth at the addictive Elizaboothy started the Swing Thing from Magknits and I felt compelled to try it too, so at the height of Saturday's windstorm Sadie and I walked to Knitomatic and picked multicoloured Noro for it. You can see the yoke almost finished in the left side of the third photo. The rest of the wool pictured is from a trip today to Romni; the rust Silky Wool is for me to try a top-down raglan, and the mauve Jo Sharp is reserved for Sadie, because I'm sure I'll figure out something else to knit for her.

I've completely lost control.